Mugsey My Golden Labrador Update

I was with Mugsey this morning @ 10:15 when he was put to sleep. He was worse. I asked the vet about other treatments but he said there was no hope, if it was his dog he would have him put to sleep. The vet had taken Mugsey to his HOUSE to put him in the hot tub twice because he thought that might do some good and would help him be more comfortable @ least. The vet shed a tear too. He said a cart was an option but I knew Mugsey wouldn't be happy and he was incontinent and just miserable.
Mugsey was fine, not scared, the medication made him shakey. He wasn't as good though as when I took him in. You never realize how much of your life is tied up in an animal till you lose them. I complained about him flopping over and hitting the box springs on the bed from the floor every night and jarring me awake. I would love to feel that again. I petted him for like 20 minutes before the vet got there and every time I would stand up from crouching down he would try to stand up to go with me. That was the worst I think.

I am fine. I've talked to my husband several times today. We are getting Mugsey's ashes back and scattering them over the farm where he loved to run (husband insisted even though it costs more and husband is shall we say thrifty). I hugged the vet and I am NOT a hugger. The vet tried to give me a beagle that was throwing a fit because she didn't like being cooped up and tried to give me a white lab that someone had dumped by his house pregnant last winter. My husband said he wants a puppy IF we get another dog soon. I can't hardly bear the thought but I know there are 1000's of puppies that need homes.

I'll never forget when we got Mugsey I was delivering lunch to the crew when they were cleaning up after Katrina. My stepson said what about the yellow puppy when I got there, I said what yellow puppy, I saw him and that's all she wrote, my husband fell in love instantly too, he's the one that suggested I look @ him to his son. Mugsey turned into a sweet lovable clown that got in trouble quite frequently but we learned to adapt. When he wasn't doing his jumping running dance of joy around the car when I got home I thought something was wrong. I wish I'd petted him more and given him more treats. I got a garbage bag out and saw a cabinet with big dog treats in it and no big dog.

I think I feel guilty because I didn't always put Mugsey first after he was grown, but he liked to be outside and he came in when we were home, he would get in trouble for chasing cats and dragging things in the yard, his pile of treasures just disappeared recently, rocks, sticks, bones, and empty plastic bottles. He was my husbands dog too but he only had him overnight by himself once, he's been with me the rest of the time. I feel bad too because it was my husbands dog (supposedly) and my dog (Dispatch) is fat sassy and healthy. I've got more pictures of Mugsey than any other dog besides Dispatch and I've had 3 times as long to take pictures of Dispatch. I've cried more for Mugsey than I ever have any other dog too (and most people who have died), but usually if they are killed or die it's quick. I feel bad because I didn't buy him more stuffed animals to destroy, he loved nothing better than to chew a hole in a stuffed animal and start pulling stuffing out, would keep him occupied for hours.

I must get to other things, I've been trying to work and cut back on bad habits and loafing (reading and napping), I need to make today go by fast.